4 things every child needs before breakfast

4 things every child needs before breakfast4 things every child needs before breakfastThe way you see a child is the way you treat them and the way you treat them is who they will become. - adapted a quote from GoetheMost children wake up the same way their parents wake upeither flustered and in a rush, orwith no plan or strategy for how to succeed at the dayChildren shouldnt be expected to know how to start their day off right. They shouldnt be expected to know how confidence is built, or how momentum and motivation works.But their parents should understand these things. And their parents should help their children understand and live in ways that allow them to be confident and successful.Helping a child develop confidence and momentum daily is not rocket-science.Its actually incredibly simple.At the most basic level, heres what children need immediately upon waking-uphydration for body and brain functioningphysical affectionsmall wins for confidenceappreciation and besttigungIn ord er for a child to receive these things, they need a parent who is present and caring. They need a parent who has put first things first - and already started winning themselves. A parent who has taken care of themselves so they have the wherewithal to be truly mindful of their childs needs and emotional state.If you help yur kids get these 4 things daily, they will transform. Theyll become healthier, happier, and mora confident. Theyll become mora successful in all areas of their lives.How do I know?Because for the past 3.5 years, my wife and I fostered three incredible children who we recently adopted. When we got these kids, they were an absolute wreck Youd be too if you came from their background.We had to deal with an extreme situation, and necessity is the mother of invention.Our kids are far from perfect. We all have our crazy moments. But they have made amazing progredienz And continue to do so daily When it comes to kids especially, its far more powerful to measure the GAIN S than the GAPSMostly, my incredible wife is the reason for our kids success. Shes amazing. She deserves ALL of the credit.Heres how this Successful Child Morning Routine works. And by the way, it can all be accomplished in less than 10 minutes.1. Drink lots of waterAfter a long nights rest, your body (and childs body) is often dehydrated.Hydration first thing in the morning is essential because it increases the production of new muscle and blood cells. Additionally, a hydrated body gets and uses more oxygen, which is needed to be alert and energized.Most people feel groggy the first 35 minutes after waking up. Youll be stunned how quickly you become alert and awake if you drink a huge glass of water first thing in the morning.Your body and brain need it.Your children need lots of water first thing in the morning for their developing brains and bodies.A study done by the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey found that over 50% of children in the United States are dehydra ted. This is an easy fix.For adults, it is smart to super-hydrate when you first wake-up by drinking over 20 oz. of water. The more the better.2. Physical touch and loving affectionWhile your child is drinking their morning water, it would be incredible if you were giving them a hug or a short back massage.Research shows that warmth and affection expressed by parents to their children results in life-long positive outcomes for those children. Benefits includehigh self-esteemimproved academic performancebetter parent-child communicationfew psychological and behavioral problemsConversely, children who do not have affectionate parents generally havelower self-esteemfeel more alienated, hostile, aggressive, and antisocialIn 2010, researchers at Duke Medical School found that babies with very affectionate and attentive mothers grow up to be happier, more resilient, and less anxious adults. In that study, most of the mothers showed normal levels of affection but only 6% shows high levels of affection.Numerous studies on the effects of massage show the positive benefits it offers to reduce anxiety in children. A short and loving massage is an incredible way for parents to connect to their children, both physically and emotionally.A study among adults showed that those who received physical affection from their parents as children had less depression and anxiety as adults.Your child needs to feel your love first thing in the morning. Words are extremely powerful. But physical touch is also very important.This doesnt need to take long. Even 30-60 seconds of loving physical tough. A short massage or back scratch and some kind words. This will work wonder for your relationships with your child - which is essential for their well-being. It will also work wonders for your child individually in all areas of their lives.3. Quick small winsTheres a growing body of research showing that confidence and positive habits are the product of small daily wins (see BJ Foggs research at Stanford for more info).Confidence is fickle. It needs to be re-established daily.Confidence is the byproduct of successful behavior. In the recent hit book, MAKE YOUR BED Little Things That Can Change Your Life And Maybe the World, author and famed Navy Seal William McRaven explains how making his bed first thing in the morning changed his life. It got him in the habit of winning. It created confidence first thing in the morning, which rippled into other wins throughout the day.Momentum and confidence are highly connected.When you wake up and get a few small wins, your confidence increases. If you wake up and dont start winning, then confidence drops.When you get even a small win, like making your bed, you feel more confident to keep winning. This leads to momentum.Your children should get a few small and easy wins right after they wake up. This will create new and daily confidence in their lives.Confidence and momentum are that simple. As is motivation. Motivation is the bypro duct of positive action.Its important to note that your confidence as a parent is also based on the fact that you yourself have been winning in the morning before you have interfaced with your child.If you havent put first things first, you wont have as much confidence when you interact with your kids. If youre not confident yourself, you shouldnt expect to raise a confident child.Regardless of what has happened in the past, confidence is something you can build daily. Just get some small wins. Whatever that means for you. Here are a few solid ways to win in the morningmake your beddrink a big glass of waterprayer and meditationread or listen to uplifting materialwrite in your journal about your day and the person you intend to bego for a walk or do a workoutmake progress on a personal goalYou dont need to do all of these. Even one or two will make a big impact on WHO YOU ARE when you interact with your children first thing in the morning.Your emotional and psychological tone comple tely influences your childrens. If youre feeling amazing because youve already been winning yourself, then youll project that energy onto your children. Youll love them more. Youll give them more attention and affection, because youll have the capacity to do so.Theyll feed off that energy and begin winning themselves. They will be more positive toward others, because youre being more positive and loving toward them.4. Appreciation and affirmationFinally, its important that your children are receiving praise and affirmation first thing in the morning. Especially in response to the wins they are getting.If your child makes their bed and drinks a glass of water first thing in the morning, it is powerful if they are acknowledged for that.Appreciate them for what theyve done. Affirm their behavior. This will positively condition them to continue doing so.Research on gratitude shows that when a person expresses gratitude, they change how they see the person. As Dr. Wayne Dyer said, When y ou change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.When you express gratitude, you love the people youre grateful for. Words are powerful things. They change emotions and feelings. As Harvard psychologist Jerome Bruner has said, Youre more likely to act yourself into feeling, than feeling yourself into action.When you express gratitude, you feel more love.Love is a byproduct of positive action.When you express and show love through physical and verbal affection, youll feel more love for them.Theyll be more confident and youll be more confident as their parent. Theyll be winning because youll be winning.ConclusionYou pile up enough tomorrows, and youll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays. - Meredith WillsonChildhood is short.Im stunned how fast the past 3.5 years have gone since we got our kids.When we got our kids, they were 3, 5, and 7. Now they are almost 7, 9, and 11How did that happen?Dont waste another day. Your children are worth so mu ch. If you can help your children start winning in the morning, they will get more consistent at winning throughout their life.Of course, perfection should not be the goal. We all have plenty of off days. Parenthood is nuts Compassion and love are essential for both yourself and your children when things arent going as well as they could.Keep working at it.Consistency is the goal. Daily progress is the goal.Confidence and momentum are built one day at a time. Every single day.For both your children and you, it all starts with how you wake up in the morning. And then, how you help your kids proactively wake up themselves.Ready to upgrade?Ive created a cheat sheet for putting yourself into a PEAK-STATE, immediately. You follow this daily, your life will change very quickly.Get the cheat sheet hereThis column first appeared on Medium.